


Go Fuck Yourself

by orphan_account



Category: Bandom, Panic At The Disco
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-05
Updated: 2011-08-05
Packaged: 2017-10-22 06:40:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/235008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The thing is, Dallon really loves having a cock in his ass.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Go Fuck Yourself

The thing is, Dallon really loves having a cock in his ass. And yeah, when Breezy fucks him with a strap-on, it's nice. But nothing really compares to having a warm, real, _twitching_ cock in his ass. It's like nothing else. There isn't a word for it, but Dallon would call it perfect.

And Brendon. Brendon is shamelessly a bottom. He takes cock like a pro and doesn't really get off on fucking someone. He's fucked Dallon before, sure, but he's already told Dallon he'd much rather be fucked into oblivion. So he can't really ask Brendon to do something he doesn't really enjoy.  

Now Dallon has to endure not being fucked and it's getting to be a bit ridiculous. He isn't allowed to sleep with anyone but Brendon according to Breezy, so it isn't like he can ask Spencer-- or even Ian-- to fuck him, which isn't even fair. 

So when he's all alone in his bunk, finally having the time to jerk off to the fantasies of being _fucked_ , he buries three fingers inside after a minute and it's not enough. It's not a cock. It's not what he needs. This can't satisfy him deep down in his _bones_ the way a real cock can. So he stops fingering himself and thinks. Is there a way to convince Breezy to let him play with someone else? He doesn't want to sound demanding or like he's not happy or she's not enough for him. Because that's not it at all. It's just, no matter how much he wishes she did, she does not have a real cock.

So he thinks. And thinks. While his poor cock is flushed and hard on his stomach at the thought of finally being fucked again. He has no idea when that's gonna happen if he doesn't do something about it himself.

Himself. _Himself_. Interesting, now that he thinks about it. Could he possibly--? _Is_ it possible to fuck yourself? Like literally?

Dallon lays in his bunk and thinks about that for a long while. He could try, maybe. But it'd have to be when no one was on the bus or something because there's been way too many times when someone has walked in on him jerking off. Mostly Brendon, but still. That'd be a little embarrassing to have someone find him with his own dick up his ass. So. Alone. He'll do it when he's alone. In the meantime, he'll research. And right now, he'll jerk off thinking about it.

\-----

He researches it. Google, Yahoo, ChaCha. Just to be sure. Because he types 'Is it possible to fuck yourself?' and the first site on Google said, yes, it is possible. But he still double checks, triple checks. Just-- because. He wants to be completely sure about this.

He even finds a video of a guy doing it. It's... interesting. Actually, it's pretty fucking hot, if he's completely honest with himself. He's pretty much blown away. His mouth waters and his jeans tighten considerably and he has to close the browser. There are still people on the bus and he doesn't really have time to jerk off before they have to leave the bus for the show. He clears his internet history four times and restarts his laptop to clear the history _again_. Because he does _not_ want anyone, under any circumstances, to know what he's been looking up. It's nobody's business but his own. And it's embarrassing that he has to resort to fucking himself. Just to get fucked, seriously.  

He really can't wait to have the bus to himself. Or maybe, since tonight's a hotel night, he can convince Brendon to leave the room for a while. He should be able to get him to bug Ian and Spencer for a little while at least. Maybe.

\-----

In the end, Brendon is clingy and wanting and wouldn't leave the room even if it was burning down. He wants Dallon to fuck him and is relentless. So Dallon has to be the top that Brendon's come to expect. And it's not like fucking Brendon is exactly a hardship. He loves fucking him, but it still leaves him wanting more. He wants a cock in his ass and then maybe this tightness in his chest will settle out for a while. It's leaving him restless with want and he hates feeling that way. He just _wants_ so bad. And he can't really try it in the shower. Or when Brendon's in the shower because he usually doesn't take long. So Dallon's stuck, again. No way to get any alone time.

\-----

Dallon's jumpy and even more restless a week later. They're back on the road and he's never alone. He's got Brendon all up in his face all the time, and Spencer and Ian wanting to play video games or hang out. And he doesn't mind hanging out with any of them under normal fucking circumstances, but he really just wants to be alone so he can fuck himself. Really. Is that too much to ask for?

So, fuck it, he decides. He's gonna do it tonight while everyone's asleep. He waits and waits until the bus is completely quiet, only the sound of the engine and the occasional sound of the outside world peeping in. He hears the shuffling of Brendon sleeping, that boy does not settle when he sleeps. He's just as energetic or whatever in his sleep. He hears nothing from Ian because he's quiet in his sleep. And he hears Spencer's light snoring, of course. He makes sure to wait another twenty minutes before he starts, just so he knows everyone is deep in their sleep and won't be woken by Dallon shuffling around.

He starts off like he always does: sliding a hand down his naked body slowly, with purpose. He wraps a loose fist around his cock and teases himself with lazy strokes. He grabs his lube from under his pillow and slicks his fingers up. He realizes he's  _nervous_. Why is he nervous? He shakes his head and calms himself down before he presses his middle finger inside. He's tight, wound up from all this anticipation. He thrusts shallowly before adding his index finger. He's really tense. He needs to just calm down and do this. He relaxes a little when he brushes his prostate. His fingers jab at the gland and his muscle relax even more after a minute. He finergs himself for a few minutes, but stops at two fingers because he always likes the stretch of being filled by a dick. Even if it's going to be his own dick. He really can't wrap his head around the fact that he's going to attempt to fuck himself. Who does that?

He squeezes more lube out of the bottle and rubs it on the head of his dick. He figures if he can somehow do this, he isn't going to get much of his dick inside anyway. He moves his balls to the side and starts to bend his dick back. Which feels weird. Really weird. It doesn't particularly hurt or anything, it's just... weird is a good word to describe it. He rubs the head downward. And now he knows it's possible. He can do this, he _is_. So there isn't any reason to be slow about it now.

He's sloppy about it, no real finesse with his movements. He just sort of presses the head inside and _fuck_. His hand tightens on his balls because he's afraid he might blow right now from the feeling of a cock-- a real dick-- inside him. He can't be slow with this. He just can't. He squeezes his muscles and works his dick in and out with quick motions. It's amazing, fucking, and being fucked, even if it is by himself. He rolls his balls in his left hand and tries to press more of his cock inside. This is _fantastic_. He really, really loves having a dick inside him. He strokes his balls again and they're so _tight_. He has to stop his movements for a minute because it's too intense. He breathes deeply through his nose for a minute to steady himself.

He starts up again when he can be sure he can make this last even a little longer. He pets his cock again and pushes as much as he can inside himself. He has to bring his hand up to his mouth so he can stop from crying out and waking anyone up. He bites at his fist and he's so close. So, _so_ close. And the thought of coming inside _himself_ is such a fucking good thought, really. It has him there, teetering over the edge in seconds. He tries to hold on, make this last, but he can't. He can't hold back. And then he's coming. And _coming._ It's coating his insides and making him feel pretty spectacular. He's so _full_ , of his own come even, which has him twitching and arching and jerking almost painfully. He bites his fist harder as the orgasm washes over him and he's left shaking, trembling. The aftershocks come barreling and cresting over him and he's practically wheezing by the time he starts to come down.

He withdraws his cock and almost whines at the feeling of come dripping out of him. He hasn't felt that in a really long time. He clenches his sore muscles and basks in the gorgeous glow that comes with a _really_ fucking intense orgasm.

He lays there and closes his eyes. He thinks of how _this_ , this is what he wants more than anything. He loves this feeling and there isn't any tightness in his chest right now. He feels pretty perfect.

Maybe he should talk to Breezy about this.


End file.
